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February 7, 2008

Possibility

It was amazing, i actually had time to eat breakfast at home today. While munching on my bagel and sipping my coffee I continued to read the first chapter of The Artist Way by Julia Cameron. Here is the paragraph that I need so much that I marked it in the book with a little sticky and want to share it.

"Many of us find that we have squandered our own creative energies by investing disproportionately in the lives, hopes, dreams and plans of others. Their lives have obscured and detoured our own. As we consolidate a core through our withdrawal process, we become more able to articulate our own boundaries, dreams, and authentic goals. Our personal flexibility increases while our malleability to the whims of others decreases. We experience a heightened sense of autonomy and possibility."

Amen!

I have been doing exactly that, giving disproportionately to others lives! I easy feel obligated and then quickly egotistical that I am the only one able to help. I've been feeling greatly overwhelmed by the things i said "yes" to, things i now feel obligated to continue doing. I once heard the definition of overwhelmed as placing equal important to all tasks. I agree with that definition but it's hard to priorities collaborative projects with different people when those people feel their project is top. I can't say yes to so much and still give it all equal attention.

I am slowly scratching off things on my list of projects to finish. The end of this week will mark the completion of the 3 month freelance project and what was suppose to be a fun personal project. The personal project started out fun but then i stressed my self by being overly ambitious on hand embellishment and it having the same deadline as the freelance project. At the same time work has become extremely busy and stressful. There is a tremendous pressure to meet their crazy deadlines because of upper managements inability to time manage, I actually cried yesterday and to me that's a horrible sign.

I am a little burnt. I feel the way i did at the end of December a little fuzzy in the brain and lacking energy. Not sure what the remedy is yet. If I can just make it to the end of next week then I think I’ll be good.

3 What do you think?:

rhon said...

"The Artists Way" is a great book. I've never made it all the way through it, though. I think it's because I'm still struggling with priorities and accepting myself as an artist.

It's incredibly difficult to say, "no". I've been working on this for years. Be prepared. You will meet great resistance. People will be offended, shocked, and perplexed when they hear the word. It really throws your game.

I think I'm much better at it. I seem to say no to outside requests better. The next stage is just as hard. When to say no to yourself. It's just as frustrating but the journey is more interesting. It's a process of discovering what your real passions are.

Remember to give yourself permission.

Mike said...

Hmm. Very interesting.


Mike
http://somethingaboutparenting.typepad.com/

http://www.mikeleonen.com/

roseymum said...

I think we do all feel that way at one time or another. I too, have recently felt this, and it helps to stop. slow. down. and recharge. Then get your creative juices flowing again! Good luck! Your blog is great:-)