March 18, 2008


I ain't seein' no results people! I have come to the conclusion that food is the issue. I have had a personal trainer since Nov. and i am exactly the same weight. I know, I know, it's not the numbers it's the inches. Fine, i haven't seen any change there either, while i have not measured my self in about 3 months, my clothes are not fitting any differently. Weight training and a little cardio is not going to cut it.

I picked up the book "The Writing Diet" by Julia Cameron, the same woman who wrote the ever popular "Artist Way". I've finished the first half of the book. I could say a lot about this book so far but the point i want to make is that i've been keeping a food journal for 11 days now. Wow, do i ever let me emotions rule my eating. If i'm too tired to deal with cleaning the dishes or planning something to eat, it's fast food/take out. If i feel stressed, mad, sad or celebratory, it's all about the sugar hopefully chocolate flavored. Of course I knew this to a degree but having to write down what i eat and why i made that choice is making me much more aware.

The next step is to get past my avoidance of meal planning. I'd also like to start eating breakfast at home and not in the car. Also, i can't believe i'm saying this, I'm tired of coffee. I no longer like the Grande Vanilla Soy Lattes from Starbucks, they leave a bad taste in my mouth and make me feel heavy. I tried getting the same latte at a small coffee shop near work, this is taste better but i still get that heavy sensation. I didn't seem to mind it so much when i was making drip coffee at home but even that left a bad taste and it wasn't from a flavored creamer or a brand i didn't like. So, I'm thinking of switching to tea or it's getting closer to summer even with 3 more months of dreary rain, I might go back to drinking the protein mix with orange juice i did um, 2 (o.m.g.) summers ago.

Random things about the gym:
Does anyone else have the reaction to cry after a work out? I mean sitting in your car balling for a good 5 minutes. I have this reaction after I've had a hard weight work out i found difficult and felt wimpy after. Really, i'd prefer to start crying about 10 minutes into the session but so far i haven't. I have a young male trainer, I don't think he'd know what to do. Tonight was one of those nights. It was legs tonight and we were at the squat machine. I despise squats. The thing is, he does not even add weights to it, i'm simply resisting the weight of the machine. After about 15 of the things my legs are on fire and I want to start crying out of shear frustration of having to do 2 more sets. Then at the end i just let it all out in the car. Odd, huh?

How do some girls look so darn cute while at the gym? They have these coordinated out fits and their hair pull up but good looking. Those first few minutes i'm in the locker room of the gym I feel so frumpy, i still match in my blue capri sports pants and gray shirt but still frumpy. Once i'm actually out in the gym doing whatever, i completely forget about it but still I wish i was better at ignoring it. I am sure as heck not spending money on work out cloths. No, i'm saving that for when i drop a couple of pant sizes and need a new wardrobe.

Now that i've eaten my 3 little oranges and drunk a couple glasses of water, I'm off to bed.

1 What do you think?:

Leah said...

new banner looks great!

geneen roth writes some awesome books about emotional eating, if you're looking for more.